Author: silentfuzzle

Cake Wars: Christmas

For a season of Cake Wars contestants came in teams to compete against each other in creating the best Christmas-themed cakes across multiple rounds/episodes with the final round being a life-size gingerbread house.

This season of Christmas-themed challenges took out the best part of food-related shows (delicious-looking food) and left in the worst part of Cake Wars (cake decorating). I was mildly entertained by Cake Wars for the cake, man! The characters and things made with the food were often related to properties I didn’t care about and didn’t even look good. They may be edible, but they also aren’t appetizing: usually fondant, food coloring, and rice crispy treats and modeling chocolate that someone has rubbed their hands all over. That vanilla bean, buttercream frosting cake, however, tell me more about that.

Most of the cakes in Cake Wars: Christmas weren’t presented to the judges as food for tasting. The cakes themselves were judged purely on looks, but the judges also required and judged a separate tasting element (e.g. “Here’s cookies that we also baked.”). These tasting elements don’t even get that much emphasis. Most of the episode is dedicated to how impressive that firetruck-shaped, questionable-food on a platform screwed to a wall smeared in food coloring is.

I’m glad I skipped Cake Wars: Halloween because it would probably be the same but Halloween themed.

AKA Charlie Sheen

I was listening to this podcast “The Toxic Fuel That’s Destroying Your Motivation” when host Chris Williamson recommended AKA Charlie Sheen to Healthy Gamer’s Dr. K. The discussion had veered onto the topic of how some people get stuck in bad habits because they don’t experience the consequences. Chris said Charlie Sheen was a prime example of this and recommended the documentary as evidence.

It sounded interesting, and I have Netflix, so I figured, why not? Indeed it was a documentary about how Charlie was repeatedly rewarded handsomely for bad behavior. When he arrived to the set of Ferris Bueller’s Day Off late, the director didn’t mind, and he was later praised by audiences for the two scenes he was in and began his ascension into fame. He attempted to leave Two and a Half Men to get off drugs but was paid a ridiculous salary to stay. When he became such a crack head that he was fired, he became even more famous.

I’ve heard the name Charlie Sheen throughout my life, but it occurred to me as I was watching this documentary that I couldn’t think of anything I’d watched that had Charlie Sheen in it. Upon looking through IMDB, the two movies of his that I remember watching are Foodfight! and Scary Movie 3. Truly the height of cinema.

Is he just famous for being a drug addict? Even my favorite moment from Scary Movie 3 is more funny as I remember it (“Bring me that railroad tie… my balls… Jesus. Not that!”) than it actually is.

Also, that guy from Grace and Frankie is his dad? I guess that shows how much I pay attention to celebrities.

The Art of War

I was expecting The Art of War by Sun Tzu to be a multi-hour long audio book. When I saw it was only about an hour on Audible, I thought it must be a cliff notes or abridged version. No. Ancient Chinese military experts simply don’t waste words.

I probably knew this at some point and forgot, but the lyrics for “Art of Conflict” by VNV Nation are all The Art of War quotes.

The Demon Next Door

The Demon Next Door by Bryan Burrough tells the story of serial killer and rapist Danny Corwin. Perhaps it was the audiobook narrator’s somewhat goofy voice, but at a couple points, I laughed at how absurd the descriptions of the murders were. And I don’t know if it was intentional.

Danny failed to kill the first woman he attempted to murder, so a long recollection exists in this book of all the things Danny did to her. They are ridiculous. He waited outside her car in the school parking lot. When she arrived, he pulled a knife and demanded she let him drive her car. She laughed at him and refused but eventually allowed him to drive. He took her to a remote location where he demanded she take off her clothes. She refused until he got out of the car, which he did. Later, when he told her to get out of the car, she refused until he gave her her clothes back. After getting kicked in the crotch, he did. She got out of the car, went where he directed, and hoped he’d leave her alone. Instead, they ended up on the ground where he stabbed her experimentally.

“Do you know what you’re doing?” she asked.

The book/narrator described it like two teenagers, which they were at the time, doing something extremely stupid and regrettable while fooling around. Granted, this first victim knew Danny and probably genuinely believed he was harmless and then couldn’t believe what he was doing. A couple other points in the book, however, give the same impression: Danny has no idea what he’s doing and the victim thinks he’s ridiculous.

In a different type of comedic moment, another victim Debra Ewing sees the shadowy figure of Corwin with a knife in the parking lot at her place of work. Panicking, she runs to a bathroom and pounds on the door. Her coworker inside answers the door.

Debra dropped her purse. “I just peed all over myself!”

“Well, what’s wrong?” her coworker asked.

It’s an appropriate response for the victim to have under the circumstances but delivered as if it were a punchline. Why include this detail in the description of events leading to a murder?

Or perhaps it’s just me, and I’m a sadist. O.O

In other news, I found this audiobook more engaging than We Own This City, and I wonder if it’s related to my theory about the lack of mystery in most of We Own This City. In The Demon Next Door, I’m always sure that Danny is the murderer, but for a few of the murders, the writer doesn’t name Danny as the murderer right away. Instead, they are presented from the perspective of the detectives, suspecting Danny but struggling to find the evidence or motive to prove it.

The Secret Daughter

The Secret Daughter by Forest Sounds is the audiobook version of a documentary with a narrator describing the stories events and occasional interview snippets of the story’s subjects.

I spent most of the audiobook thinking how stupid it was that the producers hired actors to pretend they were being interviewed. Only at the end of the book did I consider the possibility that the interviewees were actually the people in the story, which they probably were. Whoops. I blame it on Crimes Scenes! The Secret Daughter was more sensationalism but not true crime and, in retrospect, probably not told through dramatic reenactments.

Crime Scenes

At first, I thought Crime Scenes by Vespucci was sensational, American homicide stories for people in the UK, but only the first episode takes place in Disney’s planned community in Celebration, Florida. The settings of other episodes include an island in Wales, the Caribbean, and Australia. The episodes are the audiobook equivalent of TV shows like Unsolved Mysteries, featuring narrated dramatic reenactments. A very British-sounding narrator tells each homicide story interlaced with the voices of other actors reenacting the actual or plausible words of the story’s subjects. It’s cheesy and the pace is plodding in comparison to the massive amount of information in the previous audiobook I listened to We Own This City, but the stories were interesting enough.

We Own This City

Most of We Own This City: A True Story of Crime, Cops, and Corruption by Justin Fenton follows Sergeant Wayne Jenkins in the series of crimes he and his unit, the Gun Trace Task Force, commit. This includes selling drugs they stole, stealing money, and beating, framing, and even killing people, namely criminals that do about the same things they do.

In the last third of the book, Jenkins and all members of his unit are arrested and prosecuted. This part of the book engaged me the most. In particular, it describes the mysterious death of Sean Suiter, a fellow dirty cop who was shot in the head the day before he was scheduled to testify against Jenkins’ unit. Upon closer examination, his death appeared to be an elaborate suicide, but it is officially classified as an unsolved homicide, perhaps executed by someone Suiter had wronged or done business with in the midst of his dirty-cop dealings.

I admit I listened to this book mostly while I was feeding my cats, and the first two thirds had trouble competing against their persistent meows. It did benefit from a second listen in that I was able to match clues I picked up toward the end of the book with details about crimes committed in the beginning of the book, but it still felt like a collection of stories about dirty cops being dirty. I suppose it was never a mystery that Jenkins was dirty, and it wasn’t presented that way. In fact, it sounded at times like it was an open secret that Jenkins and everyone else in the department was dirty, and yet he was trusted to lead an elite task force anyway. The mystery of Suiter’s death was so interesting in contrast that I wonder if the whole thing would have benefited from being presented as more of a mystery. There are plenty of stories to support that Jenkins was dirty, but what did people who trusted him see?

I wonder what the HBO series is like.

Spring Baking Championship vs. Cake Wars

Spring Baking Championship has more dignity than Cake Wars. That I recall, Spring Baking Championship only tried to sell me A Minecraft Movie. Cake Wars tries to sell me something every episode.

Also, Cake Wars judges are jerks. They will always find something wrong, even a nitpick, and it will be highlighted as a major flaw. Perhaps their criticisms are emphasized to create more tension. “Everyone’s cake has flaws! Who will win?” But it also creates the impression that everyone’s cake sucks every episode. The bakers are making a cake for a big party to celebrate some major property (Trolls, Sesame Street, Kung Fu Panda, etc.), so in the end, the property, which probably sponsored a portion of the episode, wins the cake that sucked the least. Congratulations!

For a segment of each episode, the judges will also visit the bakers while they’re making their cakes to give them some feedback. Most of the time the theme of their feedback is, “This is a terrible idea. You will fail.” There’s rarely any helpful suggestions or other constructive feedback, and the segment seems to exist solely to make the bakers doubt themselves. It’s like watching my worst nightmare every episode: someone looking at my work when I’m halfway done with it and saying, “Well, that’s stupid.”

In contrast, Spring Baking Championship‘s approach to mid-baking segments is much more constructive with the judges or host giving the bakers tips, suggestions, optimism, and curiosity. During the actual judging, the judges will also say the dessert is perfect if they think it is perfect. So yes, Spring Baking Championship has more dignity and respect for the human spirit.

August AniMeals Adoption Follow Up

In August, I adopted a bonded pair of cats from AniMeals. Adopting from AniMeals was interesting in that they require adopters to sign a contract where if adopters can no longer care for the cat in the future, they must return the cat to AniMeals. It also takes a couple days for AniMeals to respond to adoption applications because they will do a background check, including calling personal references provided to them. I didn’t expect the friends I listed as references to actually receive phone calls, but they did! I don’t think even personal references I’ve listed on a job applications actually received phone calls, but AniMeals is thorough.

Anyway, since AniMeals is more involved in the lives of their adopted cats than the typical shelter is, they sent me an email to ask if I’d share an update about how the cats have adjusted. Below is the questionnaire I filled out for them, and a few of the pictures I sent.

1. Did you rename your kitty?

I adopted Stella and Bodie, now known as Night and Mr. Black.

Night and Mr. Black merging into one.

2. How did your kitty adjust to your home?

It took some time for them to adjust to the house, my other cat Luna, and me. They stayed in their safe room and didn’t like leaving it for about three weeks. Night can still be skittish outside her safe spaces, but she is slowly getting more comfortable with me and the house. Her latest favorite place is lounging on my desk while I’m working. Mr. Black, who has settled in with much greater ease, gives her confidence when she’s feeling shy. Both of them like pets, watching birds out the windows, and playing with toys. Black will throw himself on the floor to ask for full body pets. Night likes playing with cat wands, and Mr. Black can often be heard playing with stuffed mice and toy balls late into the night. They’ve always been polite to and tolerant of Luna, who is slowly accepting them into her house. While they aren’t friends yet, the three of them frequently lounge in their favorite spots on the couch together.

Luna, Mr. Black, and Night lounging on the couch.
Luna, Mr. Black, and Night lounging on the couch.

3. Have any behavior issues arisen since adopting?

No major behavior issues have arisen since adopting them. Mr. Black occasionally picks a fight with Night and has swatted at Luna, particularly around meal time, but nothing too concerning.

Night perched on my desk.

4. Is your kitty eating & using the litter box, okay?

Both of them eat and use their litter boxes fine. Mr. Black had some diarrhea initially that resulted in messes at the entrance to the litter box, but I’ve since identified that as a sensitivity to fish.
Mr. Black perched on the couch.

5. Have you been to the vet since adopting, and if so, did anything arise from the visit?

I’ve taken them to the vet and had bloodwork done for both of them. Night’s bloodwork was perfect, but Mr. Black had some abnormal kidney values. I’ve since put them both on an all-wet food diet (except for a few crunchy treats they enjoy). Mr. Black will have his kidney values tested again in a couple months.

Night and Mr. Black cleaning each other.

6. Would you adopt from us again in the future?

I would definitely adopt from AniMeals again!